Well, after being hax0red!!123 twice last week, I figured that it was about time I upgraded to WordPress 2.02. Fortuntely, everything seems to have gone pretty well (unlike the last time), but if anyone notices anything that’s not working properly, I’d appreciate it if you would let me know.

Thank you!

Well, The Japanese Tradition: Sushi and Hard Gay videos are all back online. Generous thanks are due to one and only Daniel Drucker for kindly informing me of the existence of Coral Cache, which has allowed me to put the videos back online and (hopefully) not have to pay any more than the $16.61 in extra bandwidth fees that I’ve already been charged.

Oh, and just in case anyone thought I was joking about the inordinate number of visitors recently finding their way to this site via web searches for “gay,” here are the Search Query graphs from my web host’s stats from the past three days:

November 14

November 15

November 16

Interesting, to say the least.

I’ve actually come to find quite a bit of enjoyment in discovering what sorts of search keywords lead people to this site. While I don’t check the logs as often as when I first began polluting the internet with textual excrement, doing so always offers me a fascinating and highly amusing look into the depravity and licentiousness that define the human race, and honestly makes me feel pretty good about myself due to the fact at least I’m not as whacko as some of you are.

I’ve previously posted some common search words that frequently bring visitors to this site, but in light of the recent gay video searches, I thought I’d go through the list that I’ve been keeping for the past year or so of the most disturbing and revolting queries this site has received and post a few of the gems. Behold:

· nude meteorologists

– I don’t know why, but something about the combination of those two words totally cracks me up.

· where to find girls who like to give men blow jobs

– Along with the origin of the universe and the meaning of life, this must surely rank as one of most pondered questions in mankind’s external existential quest for truth.

· why do men find breast fondling interesting?

– Yet another question of the ages.

· i want someone to fondle my breasts in vancouver

– Don’t we all?

· effects of excessive breast fondling

– Hmm, I’m sensing a theme here.

· nude pictures of girls with camel toes

– Wait a minute, if they’re nude, how can they have camel toes?!

· old jap nipples

– I honestly don’t know if I can think of anything more disgusting than this.

· pictures of old fat women in bikinis

– Oh wait, yes I can.

· drawings of nintendo girls in panties

– Ooo, Princess Peach, sexxxy.

· morning musume using the bathroom hentai pictures

– I don’t know about you, but I certainly can’t think of anything hotter than cartoon drawings of young girls emptying the contents of their bowels. (NSFW!)

· forced salad tossing

– Toss my salad, bitch!

· what is reaming the anal area of women?

– A good time.

· photo sex women between 10-12 years

– This one came from Saudi Arabia, no less.

· photos of naughty celebrities wearing schoolgirl outfits

– Gee, cliché much?

· sexual fantasies about matronly middle aged women

– Paging Dr. Freud…

· scaring the shit out of your wife at 2:00 am

– Now this guy sounds like a fun person to live with!

· how to become a slave in japan

– Get a job at a Japanese company. (*rimshot*)

Man, there is nothing quite like entertainment at the expense of those who are even more fucked up in the head than you are.

Update: The Hard Gay videos are all back online.

Update: The sushi video is back online.

Well, it finally happened. A combination of that sushi video I posted in July suddenly being direct- linked on dozens of blogs and forums and an inexplicably enormous number of people recently finding their way to the Hard Gay post from September via Yahoo!/Altavista video searches for “gay” has nearly sucked my month’s allocation of bandwidth dry.

Now, seeing as I’m not exactly thrilled about the idea of paying for additional bandwidth, I’ve decided to temporarily take the videos offline. I apologize for the inconvenience, but with the wedding (and due date for payment thereof) now nearly a month away, I’ve been trying to limit extraneous expenses. The new billing cycle begins on the 25th, so I’ll put the videos back up on that day and hopefully by then everyone will have decided that I’m a total prick for taking them down and will have subsequently vowed never to return to this site, thus solving the bandwidth issue.

To anyone who hasn’t seen the videos yet, I’m sorry; I promise I’ll put them back up on the 25th. Your patience and understanding are greatly appreciated.

As are very large monetary donations.

Just kidding.

As for the folks relying on Yahoo! to find videos of “gay,” I really feel that I must inform you that there have got to be at least a gazillion better places on the internet to find gay porn. Of course, being the glorious specimen of heterosexuality that I am, I don’t have a clue as to where, however I might recommend refraining from furiously masturbating over short grainy clips of dudes reaming each other in the ass for a few minutes to educate yourself about BitTorrent technology and, for crissakes, Google.com. You’re very welcome.

Well, as hard as it is for me to believe, an entire year has now passed since I made the very first post on this site.

At the time, I had no idea in what the heck I was going to write about (I still don’t), but I’ve certainly had a good time pulling 145 posts’ worth of fluff out of my posterior over the past 365 days. Of course, conbinibento.com likely wouldn’t even be here anymore were it not for the hundreds handful of readers who stop by regularly and skim the uninteresting and poorly written entires and browse the overexposed and pitifully dull photos.

Thanks, everyone.

Yikes, this sounds like an acceptance speech or something. To be honest, right now I’m mainly just surprised that I’ve actually managed to keep up with semi-regular postings for an entire year. For a chronically lazy bastard like myself, that’s no petty feat!

Anyhow, if anyone has any ideas, suggestions, criticism (constructive or otherwise), etc., about the site, I’d be more than pleased to hear it. I aim to please.

It appears that the nightmare that was the WordPress 1.5 upgrade has come to an end.

After a few more hours of browsing through the support forums and going through code line-by-line, it appears that the main problem with regard to the comments section was that the wp-comments.php file that the upgrade instructions say to import from 1.2 is, in fact, just not all that compatable with 1.5. Sure enough, many other WP users reported similar problems.

Anyhow, the site appears to be back to normal as far as I can tell, however if anyone happens to notice anything out of the ordinary, I’d appreciate it if you could let me know. It probably would be a good idea for me to go ahead and do a complete redesign, but seeing as I’m naturally inclined to be a lazy bastard, I think I might put that off for just a little longer.

I had seriously envisioned myself spending the entire weekend in front of the computer trying to sort things out with the coding, so it’s such a relief knowing that I can now spend the time pursuing other, more enjoyable activities. Lock your doors, folks!

Well, I gone done it now.

I broke my blog.

Today I decided to take the plunge and try to upgrade to WordPress 1.5. I had hoped it would be a smooth transition for the most part except for a little bit of tweaking here and there in order to accommodate the bento layout that I had made originally from scratch. Boy, was I wrong.

Although I followed the upgrade instructions to a T, there must have been flaws in my code (I had always assumed there were) and I encountered some problems — numerous annoying, enigmatic problems that were hard enough to identify, let alone solve. After a few hours of fiddling with things, I finally managed to get the layout to appear almost as it should (albeit a bit wonky), however the comments section is still being difficult and is refusing to display.

At this point I’m seriously regretting trying to upgrade. . . one of these days I’ve simply just got to accept the limitations of my intellectual capacity. I’ve reached my wits’ end and it now appears that the only viable solution will be to completely redesign the bento layout into a “theme” compatible with WordPress 1.5, or find an entirely new theme altogether. Hopefully I can get this all sorted out within the next couple of days, and the upgrade will ultimately be worth it. In the meantime, I hope you can bear with the current jacked-up state of this site. You have my sincerest apologies.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to go hit the sauce. . . .

Did you know that many Japanese companies have beds/cots on-site for employees to grab a few winks when they are forced to work overnight? Many also have arrangements for discounts at nearby hotels for employees who can’t return home because they worked so late that the trains have stopped running.

Just a little bit of trivia for you this evening, as I sit in my office at 11:00 at night, rapidly succumbing to the combination of exhaustion, hunger and stress. God forbid, I betray the company with my lazy American ways and put off anything until tomorrow morning!

Anyhow, I just wanted to let everyone [all two of you] know that last night I set up a nice sortable archives page for this site. The coding would be far too difficult for a numbskull like me to come up with on my own, so I found a nice plugin instead. You can check it out either by clicking here or on the word ‘archives’ on the menu on the left.

I also installed an anti-spam plugin in response to the onslaught of comment spam that I have been receiving lately from a particular spammer advertising a certain online card game (the tosser). The only problem is that the there’s a chance that legitimate, non-spam comments won’t make it through the filter (as has already happened at least once). Therefore, if anyone tries to post a comment and encounters a message saying that you have been banned from commenting because you’re a no-good, stinkin’ spammer, please just email me at the address on the ‘about‘ page and I’ll try to set things right.

Okaaay, time for me to regresar a mi casa. Have a good night!

Sometimes when you’re in a foreign country, you’ll see something that you wouldn’t ever expect to see “back home” and it makes you laugh. It could be something funny, something strange, or even something mildly disturbing, but no matter the reason, it amuses you and the memory stays with you.

Since moving to Japan, I’ve certainly had my fair share of such experiences, but rarely have I had a camera nearby to capture them. However, on those rare occasions when I do happen to have a camera handy, I always try to politely snap a photo or two (that is, if I can manage to stop flagrantly gawking and pointing for a moment).

Thus, I now present to you the new Random Japan gallery. (I considered calling it the ‘Weird-Ass Shit’ gallery, but that didn’t seem very catchy.) I’m starting it off with the three photos below and will update it from time to time (i.e., when I can be bothered to do so), possibly with some sort of theme for each update. Today’s theme, I guess, is “people”. More specifically, people being weird. Weird-ass people. Doing weird-ass shit.

The ‘about’ page is now up. Why don’t you take a peek?

Over the weekend I worked on trying to set up a gallery for the site. Apparently, I’m starting to get the hang of CSS and PHP (haha, yeah right) because getting the gallery layout to my liking was far less frustrating than originally getting the site set up. I used the Singapore PHP gallery web application, which I suppose is pretty low-tech since it doesn’t have all the bells and whistles a MySQL database would enable (huh?), but it’ll do for the time being.

Unfortunately, I didn’t have enough time to prepare any new photos to stick in the gallery, so instead I uploaded some old photos from my August 2002 trip to Hokkaido in northern Japan. Sadly, the originals were all lost when my laptop was stolen last year (must . . . suppress . . . rage), so the images in the gallery are smaller copies. You can access the gallery by clicking on the “photos” link in the menu on the left or go directly to the Hokkaido photos directly by clicking here. The photos are crap, I know, but I’ll try to put some new ones up soon.

Coca-Cola began selling their new C2 cola in Japan this week. They were passing out tiny cans of the stuff at Shibuya station the other morning and last night I gave it a try. To be honest, it tasted like a mix of regular Coke and Diet Coke - definitely an improvement over the nauseating regular diet stuff, but since I’m a skinny bastard and don’t drink soft drinks very often, I don’t really care about reduced calories or carbohydrates so I think I’ll stick with Coke classic.

Will C2 be a success? Probably not in Japan (where Vanilla Coke lasted all of two months), but possibly in the US, where people seem to want to reduce their calorie intake without actually having to reduce the amount of crap that they stuff in their faces.

In other news, I made an attempt to pretty up the site a bit. I think I’ll leave the layout as it is for now, but it’ll definitely remain a work in progress. If you’ve got a second, please let me know what you think.

This post is basically just filler, so feel free to skip it.

When I set out to create this site, I researched a number of different publishing platforms before deciding to go with WordPress due to its supposed ease-of-use and its “great potential” that I kept reading about. Getting WP installed was pretty painless, thankfully, however designing the layout to my liking has actually turned out to be a lot of work. I’ve had to rely on vague recollections from the few programming classes I took in university to do just about everything. There’s probably a much easier way to go about doing things, but seeing as I have cognitive abilities equivalent to those of a rhesus monkey, I’m stuck doing each step one-by-one, which has been a very laborious process.

At any rate, I’m hoping to at least get the layout all set up by next Monday (6/7), and then I’ll see about posting photos and whatnot so this site will have something worth looking at on it. Free free to send me some feedback about the site to email (at) this domain.

Well, until I get everything set up, your patience is much appreciated!

Welcome to the site!

I’m still getting everything set up, but I should have some content up within the next few days.

See you then!