‘Twas two days before Christmas,
And my friend Cary had volunteered
To collect donations for charity
And spread some Christmas cheer

When he told me he would do this, I had to ask why.
“It’s for the Salvation Army, won’t you stop by?”
“Sure thing,” I said. “I’ll do that for you.
“It’s not like I have anything better to do.”

At the supermarket, I arrived at ten past ten,
And there I saw Cary, my old friend.
Bursting with cheer, “Good morning!” he said,
With bells in his hand, a Santa cap on his head.

He was ringing the bells as people walked by,
Yet they paid him no attention, not even a “hi.”
We chatted together for twenty minutes or so,
But into the kettle, not one cent did go.

“Hold this,” he said, handing me the bells with a wink.
“I’m going inside to get something to drink.”
And with that, he turned and walked away,
Leaving me alone in the middle of the fray.

I couldn’t believe that he could be so cruel.
“He’d better come back soon, that rat-bastard fool.”
I stood there uncomfortably for a moment or two
And then did the only thing I knew I could do.

My palms all sweaty, my heart filled with dread,
I picked up some antlers and put them on my head.
I forced myself to make a smile, clenching my jaws.
“Ah, what the heck — it’s for a good cause.”

And so I swung those bells with feeling, with grace,
And even managed to keep that stupid smile on my face.
Cary soon returned and joined me in the throng.
He picked up more bells and began ringing along.

At that moment and to our sudden surprise,
Up came a child with joy in his eyes.
Reaching into his pocket, he pulled out some change
And dropped them into the kettle with a deafening clang.

And before we knew it, people passing began to stop
To make a donation on their way out of the shop.
First pennies then nickels then quarters and dimes,
The next thing we knew, people were putting in fives!

And so it went, until the end of our shift,
People giving from their hearts, what a nice gift!
At first I had been hesitant, but I gave it a try.
Hey, what can I say? I’m just a nice guy.